GENERALLY RUDE THINGS TO SAY

~Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!

~Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice.

~Are your parents siblings?

~As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?

~Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.

~Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?

~Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you'd had enough oxygen at birth?

~Do you want people to accept you as you are or do you want them to like you?

~Don't you have a terribly empty feeling - in your skull?

~Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?

~Don't you need a license to be that ugly?

~Every girl has the right to be ugly, but you abused the privilege!

~Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.

~Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?

~He has a mind like a steel trap - always closed!

~He is living proof that man can live without a brain!

~He is the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to build an idiot.

~He's not stupid; he's possessed by a retarded ghost.

~Here's 20 cents. Call all your friends and bring back some change!

~Hi! I'm a human being! What are you?

~How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?

~I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

~I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you've never used it.

~I bet your mother has a loud bark!

~I could make a monkey out of you, but why should I take all the credit?

~I don't consider you a vulture. I consider you something a vulture would eat.

~I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!

~I don't think you are a fool. But then what's MY opinion against thousands of others?

~I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.

~I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?

~I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!

~I heard you went to have your head examined but the doctors found nothing there.

~I know you are nobody's fool but maybe someone will adopt you.

~I thought of you all day today. I was at the zoo.

~I would ask you how old you are but I know you can't count that high.

~I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?

~I'd like to leave you with one thought...but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it!

~I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV.

~I'll never forget the first time we met - although I'll keep trying.

~I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

~I've seen people like you before, but I had to pay admission!

~If I ever need a brain transplant, I'd choose yours because I'd want a brain that had never been used.

~If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.

~If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder; it would be genocide!

~If what you don't know can't hurt you, she's invulnerable.

~If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.

~If your brain was chocolate it wouldn't fill an M&M.

~Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent.

~Learn from your parents' mistakes - use birth control!

~Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.

~So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.

~Some day you will find yourself - and wish you hadn't.

~There is no vaccine against stupidity.